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How to cite this comment: Other sites have popped up in recent years to siphon off the Casual Encounters crowd, like AshleyMadison. On a blustery day in early spring, sitting in a small coffee shop near the campus of New York University, where she is an adjunct professor of psychology, she was unable to load onto her laptop the Web site that we had met to discuss. Nola, for instance, said in a telephone interview that she got an erotic thrill from giving men her used underwear, knowing they would serve as fetish objects.